53 Things I’ve Learned in 53 Years

In honor of completing one more lap around the sun, I’m bringing back one of my favorite birthday traditions. (I’m also soft launching a new blog over the next couple of weeks. This will eventually be the first entry. Stay tuned!)

A LOT has changed since the last time I did one of these. Third Day ended and I got a teaching job. Then Third Day started back up, at least for a season. My oldest daughter graduated college, and my youngest is about to be a senior in high school. I’ve got a few more gray hairs, but so many great memories.

I’ve learned a lot of things, many of them the hard way. But one thing I know above all is how much I cherish all the people God has placed in my life. If you are reading this, I am thankful for you!

OK, here goes nothing:

1. God is everything, and he is someone you can know.
2. Whatever you focus on expands. Be careful where you place your attention.
3. As soon as you quit being a follower and start blazing your own path, you will get run over by a steamroller. Get back up and get used to this feeling. This is what the path to success feels like.
4. You are far better off approaching life as if you don’t know anything. Let every moment be a teaching moment.
5. Don’t be afraid to ask for help.
6. Outer circumstances will confirm however you view your life. If you feel like everybody is out to get you, you’re right. If you feel like the world is full of decent, loving people, you’re right.
7. Prayer is the most powerful force on earth. Make it a habit.
8. The more time you spend with God, the more he will change your heart so that it is in line with his.
9. All around you are forces trying to drag you down. All around you are opportunities to live at a higher level. Often these are one and the same.
10. You have blindspots in your life that can only be seen through the eyes of other people. God has wired us this way so we will lift each other up. That’s what living in community is all about.
11. Don’t watch the news. You can be “informed”, whatever that is, through far better ways.
12. Give up trying to be right. Focus instead on trying to learn from other people.
13. The two best ways I’ve found for untangling ideas: writing and walking.
14. Every journey needs a journal. Especially yours. Get in the habit of writing things down.
15. You don’t need nearly as many things in your life as you think you do. Figure out what you really need and get rid of the rest. This goes for possessions, thoughts, and relationships.
16. The simplest way is not necessarily the easiest way, but it’s probably the best way.
17. The best way to slow time and to feel young is to try new things.
18. There is an infinite number of things you can do. Food you can eat. Books you can read. Shows you can watch. Time is finite. Choose wisely. Focus on quality.
19. 80% of just about any pursuit is malarkey. Cut out the malarkey and you are halfway there.
20. All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness. Read it. Memorize it. Talk about it with your children. Talk about it while you’re walking down the road. Weave it into your life.
21. The hardest goals are the ones you have to focus on for years. Be laser focused on the important ones you want to go after. And don’t let anything distract you from them. This might be the most important thing of all.
22. People are amazing. People are frustrating. People will bring you joy. People will let you down. Remember that you, too, are a person. Have grace with people.
23. At every juncture, whenever possible, move away from the required and towards the fun. (Thanks for teaching me this, Stephanie!)
24. You never know if you’re going to say something that will impact people. Always be encouraging. Especially to kids.
25. There’s no such thing as a guilty pleasure. If you like something, you like something. You don’t have to give an explanation and you don’t have to go along with the crowd.
26. The work is the way out.
27. If you’re working and find yourself stuck, get a change in perspective. Walk around. Go to a movie. Think about something else for awhile.
28. Guard your heart, even when people try to stomp on it. You’ve only got one.
29. You are always every age you’ve ever been. Honor yourself at different ages. Don’t be afraid to do something that 7 year old or 15 year old or 20 something year old you would have loved.
30. Ignore about 80% of the praise and about 99% of the criticism.
31. Few things can change your perspective like a great book or a great record.
32. Records are best when listened to start to finish. They’re even better when enjoyed with others.
33. Eat a little less. Exercise a little more.
34. If you are basing your life around a book that is less than five years old, chances are it is a fad.
35. Digital is cool and convenient, but analog is reliable and timeless. There is probably a happy medium involving both.
36. If you focus on your relationship with God, your relationship with everything else will fall into place.
37. Less is more. This little phrase works in just about any situation.
38. The idea of “hustle” is overrated. People scramble around doing unimportant tasks for the rush of feeling busy and important. Focus less on hustling and more on doing work that matters.
39. There is too much baggage attached to the idea of creativity. If you make something, whether it’s a painting or breakfast, you’re creative.
40. Along the same lines, there is too much baggage attached to music. We’re all scarred from childhood piano lessons I guess. People are far more musical than they think they are. I would love to see music being a thing everybody does, like tossing around a football.
41. A love of God and a love of science do not have to be mutually exclusive.
42. Whenever faced with a fork in the road, either/or kind of decision, try to figure out a way to do both.
43. Worship isn’t a genre of music. It’s a sacrificial attitude we take on in response to God’s grace and mercy in our lives. A lot of good things come out of us embracing that attitude.
44. Books tend to arrive exactly when you need them.
45. Find a way to empower and encourage the next generation. Working with teenagers has been the absolute joy of my life. So what if I have a few more gray hairs?
46. Find ways to value people over algorithms. Get recommendations from friends. Replace mindless scrolling with real human interaction.
47. If you volunteer to help out with your kid’s field trip, make sure to show up for said field trip. (Don’t ask me how I know this. Ha!)
48. Listen to your wife. She is usually right. Even if she’s not, it’s better to proceed as if she is.
49. Embrace the random. That’s where the fun usually is.
50. The internet peaked around 2011. It felt smaller, weirder, more connected, and more human. (I’m working towards bringing that back!)
51. Spiritual growth often comes from leaning into the opposite of our natural tendencies. Some of us need the temperance in speech to talk a little bit less and listen more. Some of us might need the courage to speak up more and let our voice be heard.
52. Silence is God’s first language. Practice being silent every day and let that inform the rest of your life.
53. Life gets harder with each passing year. But it also gets more and more awesome.